A few months ago I was approached by my landlord, holding a piece of paper. He handed it to me and thought it was quite amusing. I read it - it was a letter written pretending to be us (I think) in a sarcastic tone. I found it in a pile of books today, and wanted to immortalise it. Before I go on - here it is (copied directly):
LOUD MUSIC LATE AT NIGHT
I am glad to hear everybody is enjoying my music while you are trying to sleep at night.
We don't care and it's your problem!!
Anyway, at least we are having fun and enjoying ourselves.
We are in fact anti-social and have no regard for anybody, especially YOU. We love playing our music every day of the week and going to keep doing so. It's so much fun and it's us that is having the fun, not you, sorry. It's probably because of our up-bringing as our parents showed us how to annoy our neighbours. I can't apologise for them, they are idiots. It's also because of our socio-economic status that we are anti-social and are unaware that it is not acceptable to keep you awake. Sorry, can't help that.
As for you, you must be sheep as we are only getting a couple of complaints. I'm surprised that you are not collectively telling me to keep it down after 10pm. But of course, that is when I start playing my music. I am also surprised that you have not phoned Noise Control. Why don't you, I'm even going to give you their number: 04-499 4444.
We never got any complaints. Not even from this person, whoever they are! A knock on the door would suffice, but instead this was posted to letterboxes on the street excluding mine. I have no proof actually, all I know is that it got to my landlord down the road and not mine - the landlord mentioned it being in other letterboxes I think.
Anyway - we had a laugh about it, felt bad for keeping people up (we had got carried away on jams til late a few times spread out over a couple of months), and then thought about this person's tactics.. How strange. Was it supposed to have the whole street turn on us? I'm not going to say what I thought, but it would have been better if they'd come and seen us instead of writing a snarky letter.
Post your thoughts, readers! (James!)